On Mentoring

It was interesting that I sat in for a professional sharing session on mentoring among the entry level adminstrative staff during work today.

It had never struck my mind before- the magnitude of God's blessings for a mentor like Mike in my life. The other people were sharing about the dilemmas involved in asking for a mentor and on deciding what a mentorship should be like. They were pretty serious about it too, discussing what makes an 'ideal' mentoring relationship and who that person should be. I spoke up and shared about Mike and I realised that hey-Mike had 'just' come along and has been a mentoring figure to me, when many people in actuality are actually grappling around for one.

To be sure-as I was sharing with the rest-Mike's 'mentoring' lasted a long time and was sustainable precisely because it wasn't formal and very intentional, and he was somebody in my life anyway, as a cell group leader. He had helped me through struggling times and had counselled me on how to approach problems practically.   But to put yourself out there like what he does, especially to coach Art as a young Christian, which I am incredibly grateful to him for, and to Alice, to whom he had imparted wisdom in spiritual matters and life management, is inspiring and made me realise that in a way, a significant life is one which gives of itself to others, whether in terms of time, money or energy, in order that they may grow.

In fact, a long time ago, Mike asked me how I was serving in church, and taken aback, I had offered the usual answers comprising of church and cell attendance, planning of events etc. And he said, 'no no..what are YOU doing to mentor and disciple others?' At that time, the magnitude of that question just went over my head and it was easy for me to brush that challenge off, saying that I wasn't good with people and that it wasn't necessary for one to 'disciple' others anyway, heavy as it sounds, if it doesn't lie in your 'giftings'.  After all, I wasn't growing very much in my life then. It took me a long while years later to understand that that was the model of transformation in a bible-believing life and community. It is how us as Christians mimick, to the best of our abilities, and through a glass darkly, the fellowship intended for eternal life. I realise now that regardless of one's station or stage in life, there is always somebody around, whether in church or at work or in school, whom you can give of yourself to, and that in turn, helps us to grow as well. It was also due to him that I decided to 'disciple' Chen, in my limited ability, in Vaasa, and which have proved to be really fulfilling.

While reflecting in Finland, I realised that I had wanted a professional mentor, one whom can guide me through career paths and career choices in life. After all, I admit there is much that I know nothing of, and I am a klutz at engineering a rise through the ranks or even to attain personal and professional growth. I look back now and realise that part of the reason why I left my previous job was the lack of a mentor. I am not that smart and environmentally-aware that I know how to maneuver my way around and build on my strengths. It made me anxious. So I prayed for a mentor. Not persistently but passingly.

And when I came to IJM, I realise that part of the internship programme allows me a structured mentoring session with the vice-president of human resources, which is my very own department! I can never comprehend why a person of his position and stature would spend time mentoring an intern like me. To mentor a growing professional, like managers or executives etc would be understandable, but ehh? an intern? True enough, there are several other vps in IJM who put themselves out there to mentor other interns in their own department, and secretly I wonder what is in it for them. I mean..seriously. But whatever the case, God has answered my prayer, and I am thankful for the opportunity and accessibility. I truly believe that one's mind and growth is sharpened by conversations had with one's betters, and I am trying to be as fruitful as I can with the sessions while not appearing to be too forthcoming and aggressive and ambitious (hmmm).

So there you have it: one's life that has been enriched my conversations, by people who have given of themselves in a deliberate intention to help others grow. While Mike does it spiritually and Tony does it professionally, the line has never been clearly drawn because both are professional Christians who have taught me in both areas. Mike works as an engineer but engages with the young people ministry on weekday nights and on weekends and in other moments in between. Tony works in a Christian environment imparting his corporate human resource and management skills in a fearlessly bible-believing organization. Both have showed me how to be personally involved in the work of God, and in the fulfillment of God's calling and one's gifts whether in work or out of it but always in life. I look at people like them, and also people like Pirjo back in Vaasa, and realise that hey, I want to be like them, believing that the time will come when it is my turn to pass on to others who would be blessed by my material, spiritual and professional support.

 It is interesting how it took a structured and professional (maybe even clinical) mentoring programme in a foreign faraway land to realise the friendship mentoring in Mike that God has always been providing for me through my growing up years at home. In fact, I wouldn't be at all surprised if my current inclination to be professionally involved in the training and development of people in organizations have actually been implanted sub-consciously through my experiences with people who have spoken life into me and have taught me the way that I should go.